My eyes ain’t used to these rays
I’m feeling exposed, but I hide no more
I can’t hide
As the sun shines on all of my glory
My flaws don’t look so bad at all
What was I so afraid of?

Every part of me is a vision of a portrait
Of Mona, of Mona Lisa
Every part of me is beautiful
And I finally see I’m a work of art
A masterpiece

 

Those are just a few of the lyrics from Jazmine Sullivan’s “Mona Lisa”, her newest single from her album, ‘Reality Show’.

 

Watching Jazmine perform the beautiful song during last night’s Black Girl’s Rock event, I felt a different kind of beautiful. I not only listened to the lyrics Jazmine was singing, but I watched her in all of confidence and in her pride. Her outer beauty radiated, reflecting from her inner beauty, as she and her flawless backup dancers showed America that we are all uniquely beautiful, regardless of size, skin color, height, etc. That’s the kind of beautiful that I felt, watching her performance.

The entire performance perfectly illustrated the fierceness that women and young girls should have about themselves. Unfortunately, we’re all not that confident.

It’s not easy living in a society where women with extra curves &/or unique skin color, etc., is undermined and undervalued, because they don’t fit the beauty standard.

Well, this performance says that we are not the standard, but the exception!

We are a “Mona Lisa”…a MASTERPIECE!

I am so here for this single to be the anthem for every little girl, young lady, and woman who thinks they aren’t good enough.

Like Jazmine says…every part of you is a vision of a portrait.

Don’t let society and mainstream media tell you any different!

Press play below for Jazmine’s epic and powerful performance!

 

The dehydration is real in these internet streets

As an active social media user, I’ve seen my fair share of MEN who post, at least, one ‘thirst trap’ a day.

What is a ‘thirst trap’, you ask?

Basically, it’s any image or statement posted to receive attention or to seek validation from others. The image could be of the person who is half-naked, and the statement could come off as if the person is auctioning off their heart, or even sex organ, to the highest bidder of the opposite sex with the best reaction. People, in general, would consider this behavior as something only a woman would do, but chile’, let me tell you! If I was given a dollar for every screenshot opportunity, I’d be rich!

thegame

From “Average Joe” the Facebook friend to public figures, it seems like men these days are just as needy for validation as some of our ladies, if not MORE needy. Social media have definitely unleashed a new breed of men who thinks that posting numerous videos of themselves working out with no shirt on, with his chest freshly coated with baby oil is a great way to network. We already know you’re cut up, so cut it out! Unless you’re a fitness trainer promoting your stuff, I don’t see the point, other than to see how many likes you’ll get from your fan base.

OR…how about those guys who makes it his mission to post images of his material possessions, failing to realize he’s overcompensating for something he’s lacking in?

OR…how about those guys who posts status updates, which obviously screams loneliness and proves he need a woman?

toosexy

 

You guys’ peculiar ways of showing the world that you’re good-looking and boyfriend material is a BIG RED INSECURITY FLAG. Trust me when I say the right woman will already see that way beyond what you post on social media. If you have a great personality, you’re already #winning.

black-man-drink-e1427386294376

Public figures, on the other hand, will use their bodies in particular to promote their work, so I’ll give a FEW of them the benefit of the doubt. The rest simply get swelled heads every time a fan expresses their “appreciation”. They ALL love the attention.

Overall, posting attention-seeking messages and images for the obvious reason is not a good look. To a lot of us, we’ll think you’re either lonely or you’re just an extreme narcissist.

 

Someone using their sexy to provoke the opposite sex is like fishing for the biggest fish to fry, but be careful because you can also attract sharks. Not all attention is good attention. Crazy come in all ages, sexes and races.

Before you post your next “workout” video with your oily chest, your car, or a status update confessing why a woman would be lucky to have you, ask yourself who you’re really trying to convince. Your fan base or yourself?

 

This isn’t about being super cocky or downright conceited. In fact, being your own cheerleader has absolutely nothing to do with vanity, but everything to do with elevating your confidence and self-esteem. We all need a little encouragement whenever we feel doubtful. It’s when that inevitable fear of failure creeps in is when we need to push ourselves the most.

Not everyone can cheer as loud as you can, so why not rely on yourself to get motivated? You know how capable you are. You know your strengths, your weaknesses, and your drive. Although, it doesn’t hurt to surround yourself with like-minded people who could help push you to achievement, but knowing that you can beat the odds can without a doubt, enhance the greatness of you.

It’s time for you to highlight the best things about you!

Use your shortcomings as motivation to become better by pushing yourself to be the best version

of (insert name here).

Get rid of those negative thoughts!

Don’t sell yourself short!

There’s nothing wrong with relying on support from others, but being your own cheerleader guarantees you 100% genuine support that you cannot get from anyone else.

 

 

A lot of us can be our own worst critic and so harshly sometimes, we begin to believe others have the same opinions about us. It leaves us wondering if we were ever good enough. It’s the pattern we’ve developed possibly at a young age, trying to measure up to people’s standards. We push ourselves to be better THAN we are, instead of just accepting and enjoying WHO we are. As a result…

We want to do more

We want to be more

We need this

We want that

It leaves us with an unbearable amount of anxiety. When things don’t go as planned, we kill our own confidence with ugly words that develops in our thoughts.

How could I be so stupid?

I am fat

I’m not beautiful, but I look good enough for this person

 

You are downplaying your fierceness with those types of thoughts.

In order for us to stop being our own worst critic, we have to accept the “repeat offender” in us. We have to keep doing the same thing until we get it right and that’s okay….even if there’s a bunch of disappointment involved during the process. We have to embrace being a work in progress instead of aiming for perfection.

Someone once told me to take as many offenses as I need to learn and that was one of the best advice ever given to me. Failed attempts, not knowing, disappointments, and lacking something are all a part of our growth. The scars we have from our many challenges are reminders of how courageous we are to even try…to accept experiences…to make changes…and to step out the box.

Also…

A big part of not being so self-critical is to accept the body that you’re in. As explained in 8 Ways To Love Yourself, the way you look, your skin type, or body weight has no bearing on what kind of a person you are. And remember..YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.

As the image says above…

You are braver than you believe

Stronger than you seem

smarter than you think

and…

loved more than you know.

…and may I add BEAUTIFUL, INSIDE & OUT!

Believe it all

 

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