Jesse Williams’ speech at the 2016 BET Awards has been the topic of everyone’s discussion since it aired Sunday night. As Jesse was giving his memorable and powerful speech on equal rights and empowerment for black Americans, the camera took a minute to focus on this gorgeous natural-haired woman with glowing skin to kill for,  watching Jesse with a look of pride.


What I’m failing to understand is why folks, particularly black women, are focusing too much on this woman’s looks. My question is…is someone who looks like Jesse Williams suppose to strut around with a Barbie-wannabee with inflated body parts, deflated confidence, and “air” for a brain?

I did a little research on Ms. Aryn Drake Lee and was impressed to discover that she is a Queen Boss and I can understand why Mr. Williams put a ring on HER finger.

She isn’t JUST the wife of an actor. She’s a successful entrepreneur who is co-creator 0f ‘Ebroji’, an app that enhances the way we communicate. She’s also a New York Real Estate Broker, and she’s an Ivy League graduate who speaks three languages.

I find it hard to believe that looks would be a major factor for the foundation of their marriage. Most of the women who questions Jesse’s taste are probably spending their bill money on Remy hair, MAC makeup, and plane tickets to Miami with a dude who wouldn’t shed a tear if they died!


Your thoughts on her looks REALLY doesn’t matter, because OBVIOUSLY Jesse thinks she’s beautiful. You google the woman and you can see she’s clearly a fan of naturalness. She’s not MAC’D down in every photo, she keeps her appearance subtle, and guess what? That says a lot about her confidence.

This exposes a problem that we face daily as a culture  and that’s struggling to get rid of the “crabs in the barrel mentality”. It’s my belief that trends are the new black, and if you’re not trendy, you don’t fit the “norm”. Apparently, Aryn’s subtle features are “abnormal” because she doesn’t appear “high maintenance”.

I encourage my sistahs who takes the time to focus on Mrs. Williams looks to lose the shallowness and mind your own. Get rid of that “crab in the barrel” mentality, and maybe you’ll get a better understanding of why looks are not the most important thing to a man; a man who searches for a woman whose outlook on life and love matches his.



Blogger extraordinaire
The chocolate girl with locs
Introvert, Libra, Love the 80s era
Michael Jackson & Kendrick Lamar are Da Baes
Janet Jackson, Jill Scott, Chrisette Michele, and Marsha Ambrosius are my besties in my head
Patti LaBelle is my spiritual auntie
I love to write and make you think!