Picture this…

You run into an old friend.

You both give updates on what’s happening in your lives since the last time you both saw each other and your friend appears to be doing great. She got married three years ago and has a lucrative career that keeps her busy. She takes a vacation every other month because she can afford it. Her tall slender frame is the result of working out six days a week. Nothing but Mac Cosmetics accentuates her features and she has so many outfits, you’ll only catch her in one at least twice a year.

By the time you both exchange numbers, you decide that you already hate her.


…because she’s married and you’re still wondering if the dude you’re feeling will treat you to dinner and a movie. She has her lucrative and exciting career, and you’re living paycheck to paycheck. As a single mother, you can’t afford to go on vacations and you’re lucky to be able to afford a bus ride to Philly. You work too hard during the day to make it to anyone’s gym, and your make-up kit stays stocked with drug store brands.

After a cpl of weeks, you reluctantly give her a call. Reluctantly, because your imagination of the phone conversation is dreadfully listening to how fabulous her life is while you wallow in self-pity. She answers hello with a cracked voice as if she’s been crying. You immediately pick up on it and asks if she’s okay. She explains why she’s been feeling down. You ask why because she appears to “have it all”. In your eyes, she should be on Cloud 9.

She tells you that it’s hard to stay on Cloud 9 when she’s so busy at work, she barely has time for herself. She takes vacations every month to get away from her emotionally and physically abusive husband. She forces herself to work out and makes herself throw up to keep her husband satisfied. She doesn’t like make-up but wears it to hide her extremely blemished skin. She wears her outfit no more than twice a year because she doesn’t like wearing what her husband picks out. She believes not being able to have children is why her husband mistreats her.

Moral of the story is….

The grass is not always greener on the other side.

Lakia Nichole

Lakia Nichole’s Blog is a platform to showcase love for my people, our culture, and all positive things in-between.